Most parents look at their children as little angels that can do no wrong, but with my daughter, it's different. I see the good and bad. I'll be the first to admit when my child is in the wrong. This is not necessarily a great thing for me. Because that precious newborn I once had who seemed absolutely "perfect" and exuding of innocence is officially gone. She's already gone as far as say negative things about how we don't love her, and how life is so unfair. It blows my mind where a 6 year old would even have the mental or emotional capacity to deal with such notions. Most of the time, I blow it off because I consider the source, and other times I can't help but mockingly retort back things like "Oh, just wait because life hasn't begun to be bad," which I don't really mean because I don't want my child to purposely be exposes to the "bad stuff" life has a tendency to over-offer. But at the same time, I snapped because hearing her say those things was just one-time too many. Our new challenge has been dealing with hygiene because my daughter is in that small percentage where nighttime bed-wetting is an occasional occurrence, and overall my daughter can smell. Literally, all the drama as of late has caused my child to missed 5 days of school this month due to being sent home, and having to go the doctor's to find some reasonable solutions for this horrible stressful situation.
Some recent solutions: getting up earlier in the morning so that if an over-night accident has occurred---time can be taken to wash-up with warm warm water and soap. I've even had to buy personal cleansing cloth packs to send in her backpack, so if she "leaks," her teacher can have her go clean herself. The teacher's concerned that kids will make fun of her for being smelly. But I feared that the kids treat her poorly more so because of her mostly negative attitude, and how abrasive she can be towards others. This whole situation has been more traumatic on me I think. I've had a hard enough time dealing with stress. My stress relief consists of crying myself to sleep, taking out my internal pain externally by screaming at my husband and picking fights, but lately the stress has become a physical toll on my body. I've been noticing bought of IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), nervous tics, my body physically shaking from a shot nervous system.
So without anger, blame, bias, or malice - here is my story of parenting as it is today. I just hope parenting this girl doesn't become the death of me before my time has arrived.